Friday, December 23, 2011

This is beyond hilarious

(I know it's dreadfully late and I should be in bed but...) I was reading my Urdu blog and don't know what motivated me to click the translate to English button, but I did. And here's the result:

More to the Planning

 پتا نہیں کیوں آج کل مجھ پہ تک بندیوں کا دورہ سا پڑ گیا ہے۔ بیٹھے بیٹھے عجیب وغریب ہونق قسم کے آئیڈیاز کی بھرمار اس کے علاوہ ہے۔ بہرحال، مزید تک بندی حاضر خدمت ہے، تاکہ عوام الناس کو اس قدر پریشان کیا جائے کہ وہ جملہ مسائل زندگی وغیرہ، جیسے بجلی کی بندش، سوئی گیس کی کمیابی، ضروریات زندگی کی گرانی وغیرہ بھول جائیں اور سر پکڑ کے رہ جائیں کہ یہ نئی افتاد کہاں سے آ پڑی۔ سوچا جائے تو ایک طرح سے یہ بھی ایک عظیم سماجی خدمات which we are free to perform. So in the words of Ibn ansah, "Sir, our qdrkru". 

Words do not speak for all
The heart is not so evident

Tell the narrative down to the heart
Do not trjman gyrku

The sanctity of the place does not have
Do not like the pasban

We knock but it is understandable
No animal by asman

When the heart of the matter is hidden
When it does not razdan


Planning for

Heart to hear what
Who let the heart

No one is loving you
How to smjhayyn

Sir, who have spent the night in 
How can we repeat it

Love, love, love, loyalty, all
Bring them to find lost

Gill is a lamp of hope
Jlayyn blood from the liver

We were luck to have pain
Let's celebrate it together

For the original version, please see the following. I am literally ROTFL.

I must say it's a vast improvement on my original poetry. Very impressed by google!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Magic pills that medical science ought to invent

1. Heartache cure pill: (Not to be confused with coronary diseases!) There should be a magic pill for heartache. Once you swallow it, you stop being hurt.

2. Fill the void pill : A pill that instantly heals the heartache and fills the void left by the departure of a loved one, especially recommended when a loved one passes away. But of course it can have multiple uses.

3. Shut-the-nosy-people-up pill: This can be particularly useful against people who keep repeating the same rude, none-of-their business questions again and again and again! Just mix it up in their drink or food you serve to them, the next time they come to visit you.

4. Lie detecting pills: Unlike the truth serum, which you have to feed to the liar, these magic pills would be swallowed by us. After swallowing them, we would gain instant psychic powers that would help us in discerning whether some one's telling the truth or not. (Of course, we should keep in mind that others can also be using this medicine. Honesty's the best policy folks!)

5. Pills for what-will-people-say-syndrome: Commonly known as "log kya kahein gey", this medicine would be highly in demand in subcontinent, where this is an inherent syndrome. After taking these pills, you would stop worrying about small, silly stuff. This can be extremely efficacious if combined with the Shut-the-nosy-people-up pill.

(Yeah, okay I am bored out of my wits. So got to write nonsensical stuff, the perfect cure to ennui.Ha!)

Tuesday, December 13, 2011